Bridesmaid: Duties & Don’ties

My friend and co worker Zoe asked me if I would be apart of her and Stefan’s wedding party and OF COURSE I said ‘Yes!’ I’m so excited and I can’t wait to start planning and collaborating with the other girls!! I have been to bachelorette parties, weddings, bridal showers and shopping trips but I have never actually been honored with the bridesmaid title, until now! So, the inspiration of this post stems from what I have seen and what I wish I hadn’t seen when it comes to bridal parties.

  1. Bride first: You second. This is a must. Remember that the bride chose you, which means a great deal. So, tap into the servant’s heart that is deep within you and be ready to show her that you have her best interest in mind.
  2. Family or Friend: It doesn’t matter if you are her sister, cousin, or friend; everyone is on the same team and you have to keep that in mind and go out of your way to be the team player that you want from the other girls.
  3. Be available: The bride knows that you have a life, career and family of your own, even if it doesn’t seem like it sometimes, just be sensitive to her and reinsure her that you have everything under control. Planning and communication is the key. Put together the best calendar and share it with everyone. It is extremely important to be transparent leading up to the big day. 
  4. Pay up: You can’t fill the position if you aren’t willing to spend some money. That’s just apart of it. The bride and bridal party should get together and make a financial chart, this will help everyone be on equal playing ground. My sister once declined to being a bridesmaid because she was pregnant and just really couldn’t commit and give her all to the tasks. And that’s okay too, no shame in saying ‘No’, it’s a lot of work. *Note* Some of the brides that I have had experience with make up their own financial chart and mail/give them to all the girls, then when she gets them back she can go from there with the rest of her planning.
  5. Speech: This is mostly for the bridesmaid, you gotta do it girlfriend!
  6. Throwing a bridal shower: This can be costly, but it doesn’t have to be! Most bridal parties have one of the girls, or the mother of the bride or groom host and everyone chips in on catering. You as a bridesmaid need to be willing to go the extra mile on this; ask the bride what she likes, then put together a menu and shower decor to present to her for approval. This shower is the time for the bride to take mental break, relax, and enjoy people that she might not get to spend quality time with for a while.
  7. During the bridal shower: Keep in mind that the bride wants everything to go smoothly, so the team of girls should have a game plan before hand. Most showers have a time for games, gifts, food, and conversing. Make sure that all of this is uniform to keep everyone smiling. *Note* If someone has annoying kids at the bridal shower… shut it down. The bride doesn’t need help opening her gifts from a stingy child or ruining all the pictures that are going to be taken.
  8. Keep records: EVERYTHING! Receipt and gift records can go a long way when it comes to everyone spending and splitting costs. All the girls need to make copies for themselves and send the hard copies to the maid of honor. I know that this might seem extreme to some people, however I have seen cases where this would have saved a lot of headache. The bride doesn’t need worries about the bridal party’s exchanges and purchases, she already has enough to worry about.
  9. Take Pictures and videos: Of course you want to actually be apart of moments, however pictures and videos are the way to go now days! There’s nothing like looking back at a great time or being able to replay it as much as you want. Also, DON’T be afraid to ask people to take pictures for the whole group, yes this means even if you need to tip them. It doesn’t matter if you are at a hotel or out shopping. There are always people who are wanting to build their portfolios and are willing to take photos and/or record videos for a lower cost, rather than someone who is already established in the business.

I hope that these tips have helped you – bride and/or bridesmaid- when it comes to wedding planning. Every little detail counts 🙂

Keep up the sass, seriously!

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1 Comment

  1. September 1, 2016 / 9:35 pm

    Best. Bridesmaid. Ever. We may have only known each other for a short amount of time, but theres some people you just click with, you’re one of my people Love you babe!

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